So hey, I know we didn’t get a chance to sit down and chat on Saturday but your security sort of got in the way. No it’s cool, don’t say anything to him, he just didn’t want you to be distracted by my astounding beauty and forget that you were there to work.
I have to say Mr. Banks that in the past I wasn’t your biggest fan. You’re good at what you do – there’s a reason they dubbed you the Punch line King – but I just couldn’t relate to you. Tony & Fif kept getting in the way with their arrests and general trouble making which is a shame because as it turns out, you’re actually kinda awesome as a person. This sounds like an innocuous statement but have you met Xzibit? Yeah, exactly.
Anyway as I was saying, I wasn’t your biggest fan. Then you stopped by Fadez*. As someone who made no publicity appearances and answered no press requests (I swear I’m not bitter), you took time out of your short stay to meet with your fans, sign autographs, take photos, meet the kids & make my baby brother’s day.
Oh and you had an entourage of two. TWO! Do you know how awesome that is? You weren’t precocious, you made time for every single person and sure it was only 20 minutes but you did not say no to a single photo, handshake or hug. You didn’t get a chance to see the little boy’s face on your way out, but as you turned around after giving him a quick handshake and half hug his face broke into the biggest smile I’ve ever seen. Meeting you must have been the most exciting thing to happen in his 10 years on earth and thankfully he didn’t have to go away thinking celebrities are a bunch of obnoxious dickheads. You let him stay a kid and I’d bet you’re now his favourite rapper. It would serve you well to remember that these kids do listen to you – don’t screw it up, alright?
I guess what I’m trying to say here, incase I wasn’t clear, is that you’re ok with me Lloyd Banks. Just stop pretending you’re not dying to meet me, you’re fooling no one but yourself.
Peace and all that good stuff,
S
(Lloyd photos c/-Jerry @ Fadez)
*Fadez Barbershop is the shiznit. My brother, possessor of the thickest hair aside from my own, actually goes back to looking like a human after 10min in their barber chair. Below is him after a skills demo. Go see them, tell Will & Jerry I sent you. They love me (hey guys!)
“The unique thing about my chicken is the taste. You got Kentucky Fried Chicken, you got Popeyes chicken, You got Churches chicken, Harold’s Chicken, Mama’s Fried Chicken and everybody’s secret you got to remember is within the breading on the chicken. The secret within the FFC [Flav's Fried Chicken] is not within the breading, it’s within the meat. I season my meat first.”
